More Than A Massage (viewer discretion)

Exhausted after a long day of travel I arrived at the hotel and was pleasantly surprised to see they offered Shiatsu massage, as many of the hotels offer in Southeast Asia.  It was very clean and nicely designed so I signed up immediately and they managed to squeeze me into their busy schedule.  I had a shower and put on the shorts and robe they offered and the attendant led me to the cubicle through Shoji screens.  It was basically a double sized mattress on the floor – low lights, soft music, but no massage table with the place to put your face, like I’m used to, but whatever.  My masseuse, a young woman who didn’t speak a lot of english, came in and introduced herself and told me to take off the robe and lie face down.   She got to work immediately… massaging my back and neck like a pro – using her hands, feet, elbows and even her knees to work the tension out… she even got up and walked along my back… just what the doctor ordered.  Suddenly I gasped as she yanked my shorts down, exposing my glutes and proceeded to massage… my ass.  It seemed a little strange but I’m in a foreign country and not sure how they might do things here.  She continued, moving up and down my legs, with my shorts still down…. and in no time was paying special attention to my… errrr… upper thigh area.  It started getting a little uncomfortable, but she then moved back up to my shoulders.  I should have felt relief but she was dragging her hair along my back at the same time. Now that definitely felt strange… and I started to tense up, my muscles starting to feel worse than when I arrived.  She continued to work my back and legs but was getting far too close to the family jewels for my liking, massaging all around the area.  She moved to my hands and arms and had them draped across her bare thighs. She was wearing a short dress, and I figured out she wasn’t wearing anything else.  She sat on my butt and continued my back – no massage therapist I had ever visited had ever done that before.  Within a few minutes she hopped off and told me to turn over.  I was a little nervous but thought I might have been reading too much into it.  She started on my chest, but instead of massaging my pecs… she was stroking my chest and then suddenly she pinched my nipple – I almost hit the roof.  I started to wonder if she was just being playful… damn I’m naïve.  She worked her way back down my legs and this time instead of stopping at my upper thighs she put her hands up the legs of my shorts and started massaging… my junk!  I immediately sat up and said ‘No No”! She asked, “why no?”  but couldn’t understand much English.  She said “monjee sleeps”.  I replied, “yes” but she seemed offended – still I wasn’t about to let her get her hands on the goods again.  I said, “just massage, just muscles” … she pouted but resumed the massage. She didn’t give up though and still kept trying to make her moves and I kept trying to keep it ‘all business’.  When she began massaging my scalp and face (with my head resting on her thighs) she said “you number one just like monjee, you want me to massage now?”  I knew what she meant and said “no, no” and at that point I think she finally got the message and quickly wrapped things up.  I gave her a $10 tip, about half the rate for the massage and she asked if I could come back the next day and she would take care of ‘baby’, and then… she kissed me!  Okay that definitely has never happened at the end of any of the other massages I’ve received.  After I got over the shock I made a beeline for the change room, got dressed as fast as lighting and ran up to my room… asking myself the whole way “WHAT was that!!”   I talked to a few people about it, and they all said a single man in Southeast Asia should expect that to happen, that it would be better if I brought along a woman friend, wife or girlfriend when I booked my next massage.   Of course I`m travelling alone and so at the end of my big cycling journey I really felt like I needed to work out my sore muscles so I decided to try again.  This time I was staying at a 5 star hotel and the attendant was an older woman.  I hoped it would go a little better this time.  We went into the cubicle and there was the massage table I was used to, a good first start.  She told me to take off my clothes and get on the table… but she didn’t leave the room… and the first words out of her mouth were ‘you are very handsome.”  Oh Oh… She worked the muscles putting me at ease although I must say I was a little nervous, especially when she was working my upper thighs, but she didn’t touch the goods.  She did pull my underwear down and massaged my glutes, but luckily that’s as ‘intimate’ as it got.  I actually felt great after and was glad I took a chance and tried a `therapeutic`massage again.

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One Response to “More Than A Massage (viewer discretion)”

  1. Lindsay
    February 9 at 9:46 pm #

    OMG!!! Darren!!!!! I’m sorry, but I am dying right now….

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